Saturday 15th March

Im late in posting the blog today because I cant decide what to write about!!  Lots of competing thoughts in my head but none of them seem quite right.  So I am falling back on my daily reading which is from Psalm 51.  And the verses which particularly strike me as I read it today are

You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
    you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
17 My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit;
    a broken and contrite heart
    you, God, will not despise.

I have several friends who are going through separation and divorce at the moment.  And I think its safe to say that the experience has broken their spirits.  Knocked them sideways, pulled the rug, dealt an almost fatal blow.   Although the circumstances are different in each case, the results are broadly the same.  There are feelings of guilt, failure, anger, betrayal, loss, despair and fear.  All of a sudden the future is very uncertain.  The present is precarious.  There is the potential of huge damage to children and the aching chasm of loneliness stretches out to infinity.  The breakdown of a relationship is a devastating thing. And if we havent been through it ourselves we all know someone who has.  Or who is going through it right now.

What I love about the psalm is that David recognises he is utterly broken.  He has been caught by God in the act of adultery.  He has committed murder in order to try to cover up his sin.  All of his relationships are trashed and everything is a huge mess.  He is entirely at fault and God would be well within His rights to wipe him off the face of the earth.  But David knows God and he knows that he is loved.  Despite it all.  Without the benefit of the sacrifice of Jesus and John 3 :16  David understands that if he brings all of his mess to God he will not be turned away.

Churches ( thats us folks) can find it difficult to know how to relate to those who are divorced/divorcing/separating.  Its especially difficult if its happening right in our midst.  People inevitably dont want to be seen to be taking sides.   We struggle with the whole ' breaking of vows' thing.  Its messy and difficult and perhaps we think its the job of the pastor to 'sort it'.   But the reality is that relationships do break down  ( partly I fear because church is not at all good at supporting marriage and pastoring people through the difficulties which lead to separation in the first place)  If God can not only forgive someone like David, but bless and honour him then surely we can find it in our hearts to be kind, tender and understanding too.

Lord, its isnt up to me to judge.  I will never know the full story.  But it is up to me to love people, to care and show understanding.  I pray for my divorced, separated, shipwrecked friends today.  Thank you that you do not despise a broken spirit.  I ask that you would draw them close to you and heal the deep hurts. Restore trust and remove fear.  Provide finances and settle disputes.  Bring hope where there has been crushing disappointment and convict of sin where poor choices have led to the breaking of promises and of families.  Help me to be a good friend to those who are struggling and bless marriages with strength and perseverence and love.